I weakened

I didn't make it for another 24 hours. I went down this evening in a fit of horniness to use him. That's what an object is for, right?

I got him up on his mattress and forced his knees under his gut so his ass was sticking up in the air. I spit lubed his hole and slowly slid my cock inside of him. He gasped and sighed as I penetrated him then pushed back to get me deeper inside of him. I set a pace to fuck him slowly and as gently as I could but ended up grasping the chain at the back of his collar for leverage as I lost control of myself. I fucked him long and hard before I shot my seed into him. I collapsed on top of him to recover. I heard him sniffle and quietly cry.

I turned him over to straddle his chest and buckled a dental gag into his mouth and spread it as wide as his mouth would open. I stuck my tongue in his mouth then spit inside of him several times before I face fucked him until I came a second time. The object was frustrated at not being able to suck me clean but I used my fingers to skim the cum from my cock into his mouth.

I thought of sitting with him for a while but I want him to know what it is to be an object.

I pulled the chains tightly through the side hasps of the waist restraints and locked them in place then pulled his legs up behind him so that he is hogtied. The weight of his leg irons added stress to the hogtie. I removed the dental gag and replaced it with a ball gag head harness and left him laying face down. I stood in the door opening and watched him, waiting to see how he reacted. He managed to force a muffled "thank you Master" through his gag. I locked the door and went upstairs to go to bed.

I thought about what I had done to my object and honestly loved the way I felt about it. I now think I can handle this part of our lifestyle.

Quick Recovery

My slave sunk into a deep regenerative sleep. His determination is admirable.

I give it permission to speak. it requested two things. it asked for a flogging with a heavy bull hide flogger and permission to have an orgasm. Both are therapeutic for it after a migraine. It helps him to relax and it opens the energy blockage from the migraine. It is the only time that it actually requests to have an orgasm.

I gagged it with a ball gag head harness and tied it to the whipping post. I flogged it until it's back was as red as the flogger itself. It gasped and moaned with each stroke. I didn't count the strokes, I kept giving it until it's energy told me it was no longer feeling it. it's eyes were red and filled with tears. I licked it's tears from it's face.

I flipped it over so that it's front side was exposed.

"Please Master."

It stopped talking, I asked it what it wanted.

"Please Master, hurt me." It was the second request to be hurt by me within 24 hours.
"Please Master, I am your object..." I stopped him by covering it's mouth with my gloved hand and pinched it's nose until it dropped off from lack of air.

I will not describe what I did to it other than to say it was the most intense torture that it has ever experienced. He passed out on me several times but I persisted. it didn't scream or cry. it looked at me in terror. It made me wank several times, each time I fed it my cum.

it took it down from the post and let it collapse at my feet. it looked up at me and said, "thank you Master". I cleaned it up and stuffed it back in it's cage to rest and heal. I didn't let it cum.

Slave into Object

I removed slave from the cage this morning after he was fed a bowl of cold unseasoned Faro that he washed down with my warm piss. Slave was removed from the cage to service me then take a cold shower to wash the stink off. It is one of two times each day that it is allowed to use the toilet. It was cuffed in Hyatt cuffs and it's nips were pegged with wood clothes pegs. It's collar was tightened by one click. I told it that he was demoted to object for the foreseeable future.

The cage is 20 inches by 40 inches by 30 inches in height. it sits on a steel floor, no padding and it has been given an old wool Army blanket.

It looks at me with pathetic eyes that are wet with tears.

I'm horny and need to wank.

Finding a privat diary on my slaves external drive.

My slave has given me absolute irrevocable power of his life, "past, present and future". He had turned his keys for everything so that nothing can be hidden. I'm learning trust from him.

I found a external storage device labeled Diaries and writings. I plugged it in and started reading. There are years worth of diaries dating back to high school and early writings about everything you can imagine.

I found references to suicide over the years that saddened me. He had even worked some plans out in detail. He was desperate for something he never felt he had. Someone to hold him tight. He wrote about feeling like a burden to his grand parents and being taken care of by housekeepers and chaperone who never quite filled his need for love.

Here is an excerpt that I feel safe in adding here

6 May 2011

I had a night with a “Top” named Alan. I was frustrated by his lack of experience. I was infuriated by wasting my time. Why do I bother? Do you think I want too much?

I’ give almost anything to find a real Master to take over my life, sort of like Max does without the history we share that keeps him from going all the way with me. It’s never going to happen. He’s been by surrogate father since I was 5.

So what do I want?

Someone bigger and stronger than me.
Someone masculine who cares little about what people think of him.
Tough and a little street wise.
Driven by a high testosterone level.
A little unwashed.
Someone who wants to turn me into his pig.
Tattoo/pierced

Someone who cares about me but has a dispassionate and sadistic side.
Someone to keep me unbalanced.
Someone to keep me balanced.
Someone who can say No to me.
Someone who won’t put up with my moody shit.
Someone who will slap the crap out of me if I say something mean or sarcastic

Someone to love me for good and bad but strong enough to eliminate the bad.

Someone who has the same wealth or has an ability to ignore mine.
Wealth can make happiness hard to find.

Someone to keep me captive and bound and torture me without hurting me.

Someone, most of all, someone that I can love, worship and respect so much that I can forget myself.

 A man who can change as our reality changes.
A man who can be Master, friend and big brother but mostly be my Master.His list went on.
 

Now for some fucking fun. My Mate Regie. He is an Irish Ginger that is fucking fun to be with. He trained me in a lot of stuff. He's here to help record some more hypnotic shit and work the slave over in ways he never felt before. Slave is in his cage except to piss and stretch and of course be fucked. Been that way for over a day. He'll stay there longer until he's good and tired of it.