Wednesday, December 31, 2014

Have a Happy and prosperous New Year
and a may all your 
Fantasies CUM true.

Reindeer and the Cold, The trip Home.

Einar's total height is about up to my waist. Alice is a few inches shorter. They are about ten and nine weeks old. They are still sporting their spots and they still like being bottle fed. They eat feed, apples, carrots and I gave them few pea sprouts from my salad a few minutes ago.

We are outside North Platte, Nebraska. Master and Christopher are in a Culver's Restaurant eating cheeseburgers while I watch my new little friends. I took them out to walk them, which created quite a stir among the locals who are more likely to see beef cattle on the streets. It is mighty fucking cold!
There is snow but not enough to keep us from traveling for a few more hours. We should be in Wyoming before stopping for the night.


Sleeping with Master is always an adventure. He always wraps his arm around me, sometime nearly suffocating me. He seems to always find my hole with his nighttime erections to fuck me. I'm not sure if he's awake sometimes.  Christopher was his target last night. I laughed to myself when Christopher protested in his sleepy rage, waking Master up and then said "What the hell!". Master pulled out and apologized, "I thought it was Trace".

Tuesday, December 30, 2014

The Trip Home with 2 Reindeer

The Reindeer are named after my Grandparents, Einar and Alice. They huddled in the midst of the heard in the pasture. We walked out, following the heard as they moved away from us. We helped to cut our boy and girl out of the heard and placed a halter on each of them and struggle a bit to get them to follow us, plying them with slices of apple. I wanted to take them all home with me.

We got them into the van. Christopher drove carefully until Einar and Alice settle down on the mats, their eyes wide open in what I presumed was fear. I settle down between them and stroked their heads until they began to look sleepy and then I laid down and fell asleep myself to catch up on the sleep that my excitement denied me last night.

We are somewhere on the west side of Des Moines Iowa. We're staying in a hotel with doors that open directly to the outdoors. I've made a bed with mats and packing blankets. Master and Christopher have taken the bed so I am on the floor near the fawn. Master and Christopher ate in a restaurant and I stayed in the van eating my meals from carry out containers. It is all working perfectly so far. We're expecting to be home late Friday but we're not in a hurry. Most of the bad weather is south of us. We're going to be traveling through some extreme cold over the next couple days.

I'm in charge of taking Einar and Alice out to relieve themselves, hoping to prevent any accidents.
I think they are trying to figure out exactly what I am and why I am sleeping with them. Einer is watchful and raises his head with every sound.

Monday, December 29, 2014


I was standing a the kitchen counter eating an apple and talking to Tony when Master quietly walked up behind me and grabbed me. He began walking me out of the room toward the hallway that leads to our bedroom. I felt overwhelming resentment at that moment, wanting to resist him but he held tight. My feeling of resentment became confused by the realization that I also felt excited by the fact that he is much stronger than I am and that he was overpowering me. I felt myself fussing into his hand and his body. I quickly put my in above my head, breaking his hold and then threw myself into him. He took me to the floor and we never made it to the bedroom. He took me right there, on the floor.


Master unlocked my chastity belt and hung it over the bed canopy rail some weeks a go. He read and article in Men's Health called "Use it or lose it". It stated that men's penises shrunk when not used regularly. It talked about the fact that most men got erections during the Rem Cycle of sleep.  The article and the fact that I am/was prevented from getting an erection most of the time concerned him. His goal was never to negate my sexuality but to keep me continuously frustrated.

That being said and done, he decided to modify my penis instead. I already had a P.A. that was useless because wearing jewelry in it was irritating because the tissue there never toughened up after healing. Jewelry or padlocks worn in conjunction of a chastity tube was okay because the jewelry had the support of the tube. So, he had my penis pierced with an Apadravya. OUCH!  He hasn't played with my cock since but it's nearly time.

We are in Wisconsin. Rather than rent a trailer, we bought a cargo van for the ranch from a dealer in Milwaukee and a pile of cargo blankets and gym mats to give our new pets a comfortable place to spend the days  traveling home. I'm excited about going to pick them up tomorrow morning and the adventure of getting the deer to know and trust us.

Thursday, December 25, 2014

Helping Hand?

I bumped into a woman in town today after we finished playing Santa Claus. She was very depressed and crying. She wanted to see her nine year old son today and give him a Christmas gift but her uncle who cares for her son allowed only a 30 minute visit.

She is an addict. I convinced her to go to a treatment center for help. She wanted to put it off until Monday but I told her that putting it off would only increase the amount of time that she would live with her pain. I drove her to a treatment center and walked in with her. I told the admitting nurse that I would pay for whatever her insurance and government did not pay.

My heart is heavy as I wish her a lasting recovery.

I'm not into drugs and not much into alcohol but sometimes I think that it would be easy to do since it seems to be a predisposition in my family. I found Vodka and Cognac bottles stashed all over my grandfather's office and bedroom when I helped to clean out my grandparents home.

I am thankful to have found Ian and the family that shares the Ranch with me. I am thankful that I found my Great Uncle and that he left me his home and land. I am thankful that I found people that help me achieve my dreams. I am thankful that I have the privilege of getting up every morning to serve Master and then go out to the barn to care for my animal friends. I am thankful that I have found painting and the encouragement to continue in the face of my doubt about my talent. These are the things that keep me sane and warm and nourished. I am thankful.

I wish that everyone understood that Love is everything and that it starts within.

Wednesday, December 24, 2014

Things and Compulsive Work

The Storms knocked out our electricity and lightening traveled through the electrical system, knocking out most of the electronics. We replaced everything, including some of the wiring. Besides that, I haven't felt much like writing.

I spend most of my days painting and working with the animals. Evenings are spent in front of the fire reading and snuggling. It was especially peaceful while the electricity was out.

We're adding a coral for the new and latest addition to the menagerie. The menagerie is a dream come true for me. I have dreamed about this for as long as I can remember so it should come as no surprise that I am adding reindeer to the family. It seems a little more that coincidental that we're planning this during the Christmas Season. We will be flying to Wisconsin and renting a trailer to bring them home.

It's Christmas eve. We bought a live aromatic cedar. The branches seem to cascade from the top. It is about twelve feet tall and it fills the entire house with cedar perfume. We loosely wove several thousand led lamps through the branches. Iron reindeer adorn the fireplace. The dining table is decorated with Della Robia of aromatic evergreen branches with fruit and silver dollar eucalyptus.

The tree will obviously be planted outdoors near the house so we can enjoy the scent all year. We're leaving the lights in the tree.  The fruit will be eaten so there is very little waste once the Yule has passed.

Speaking of Yule, We had a Winter Solstice party on Sunday with friends from the city. It got a little out of hand. Some people stayed the night and called in sick the next day.

Dinner is simple tonight. It's not befitting the decorations on the table but what the hell. Tony made Tuscan Bean soup and Olive bread.  He used the Mincemeat that Reggie sent from London for a pie.

Ian, Butch, Daniel, Christopher, Jason, Tony, The entire Menagerie and I wish you all Happy Holidays, whatever you celebrate.

Back and running


Friday, December 12, 2014

Out of Service

The door closed quietly behind. The latch slide into place and the key turned in the lock.
Alone in this cell, the cement blocks and the steel door would be my new home until Master returned home to free me. The cell had a stainless toilet and sink combination and a stainless steel platform supporting a thin tear and soil proof mattress. The small window in the door was covered from the outside and locked. A slot at waist height was where they slide my food trays into the cell or handcuff my hands behind my back before they take me to the shower.

Solitary confinement can do horrible things to a man's mind or it can free a man's mind to wander endlessly with a complete lack of awareness of the time. It just passes, robbing a man of his connection to reality.

Naked with no hair, a man can't even gauge time by the length of his hair. The chastity belt prevents self stimulation.

Three weeks have passed.


It started one afternoon when Master hogged tied me with my calves tied against my thighs. He added a rope that was tied to a rope harness that he knotted around my chest. The other end was tied around my wrists. He raised me to my knees to attach a rope from the celling to my wrists that raised them to a severe Strappado position. I could balance on my knee caps to relieve the stress in my shoulders caused by Strappado or drop to kneel normally to relieve the pain in my knees. He sat back and watched the torture that he was inflicting on me.

He came to me after I began to feel exhaustion to untie my knees. He ordered me to sit my legs in a full lotus position then tied me into the position. He added a rope between my neck and folded legs so that my face pulled toward my knees causing the Strappado to pull tight and high behind my back.

He gagged me then slapped and punched me all over my body as I began to vocalize in response to the pain.

Tuesday, December 2, 2014


Master grabbed my collar and dragged me out to the dungeon. I wondered when he would do it. He strung me up in a vertical spread eagle position with a gag and head harness both silencing me and stretching me in five directions. It felt good to have him do as he wanted without care for me or my feelings.

Of course he cares for my well being but at the time, it made it obvious that he was going to do what ever he wanted and I had not choice.

Master took the plastic box filled with Young Tongue Forceps from the cabinet and began placing them over my entire body, face, tongue and ears. I bought the clamps so I knew there are 50 pairs. He emptied the entire box then stood back with his arms crossed to admire his handy work. I moaned and came close to screaming. The clamps were still on the first click. I knew it was only the beginning. He tightened the clamps on my scrotum and hung lead weight on each of the clamps. He tightened the clamps on my cock the ratcheted the clamps on my tits until they were fully closed and tight then used plastic cable ties to tighten them even more and lock them in place in the process.

I had all I could do to keep from flipping out. I began to breath deeply, 4 breaths per minute, which helped me cope with the pain. He went about my body tightening and loosening clamps, trying his best to get me to break down and beg him to stop. I have learned that I could beg until my throat was raspy and it would do no good.

Tears flowed uncontrollably until I thought I had fainted. I momentarily blacked out and turned inward and fell into a state of resolve. I think I stopped reacting. Master began to slowly twist and remove the clamps. I felt a sting as each clamp released the flow of blood that was denied to my skin.
I dreaded having the clamps removed from my genitals while at the same time silently begging for an end to the pain.

Master teased and tormented my tits before he used the wire cutter to remove the cable ties from the clamps. Just the slight release caused pain that made me scream. He teased and twisted my tit more until he got to the loosest click on the clamp then smiled. He simultaneously yanked both clamps, stretch, abrading and releasing the grasp all at once. I screamed into the gag and felt like I was convulsing. Master played my tit with his fingers while jerking me off. I couldn't cum though my cock was rigid. He went down on me. His warm mouth felt wonderful. He teased my frenum with his tongue until I erupted straight into his mouth. He sucked me dry then cleaned every last drop of cum with his tongue.

He has taken my cum twice now.

Monday, December 1, 2014


My studio is a mess. I finally got paint of the floor and wall. It felt like a Christening. I'm usually too fastidious for my own good. Finally, making a mess seems to have been liberating. I feel like I have been moody and unapproachable lately. I was good to see Master's comment on the blog about being ok with my focus.

I like the old Japanese tradition in giving and receiving gifts. It is considered bad manners to open a gift in the presents of the giver.

Christmas "gifting" is troublesome for me because of the sense of obligation. It always has been. My grandparents helped me with that my suggesting that I give something that I was given to someone who might be without.

I give when it is least expected and when I see something that I feel the receiver would really love or need. We no longer exchange gifts at Christmas. We give to toys for tots, Share our Strength and food pantries because I believe in it. It's a simple act of compassion that improves the life of others.

I urge you to find a cause and give something to it. It doesn't need to cost money. You can give time. You will receive so much of what is truly important in life, LOVE.